November 8, 2024
Querying a Mystery
Feature

Querying a Mystery

How to Write a Query Letter That Won’t Get You Ghosted

So, you wrote a mystery novel. Congrats! You locked in the twists, stumped yourself with the red herrings, and even got to use the words unreliable narrator and plot twist. Now all that’s left is for agents to see your genius and publish you, right?

 

Well, I hate to tell you, but if you want agents to give you the time of day, you gotta nail that query letter first. Yup. That single-page, single-shot letter is your make-or-break. It’s like speed dating but for your novel, and trust me—agents swipe left fast if you don’t know the moves. Let’s get you query-fit with these killer tips (pun intended).


1. Start with a Hook That Slaps

Think of your query letter opener like it’s a line in a cop drama. It better hit harder than a donut-fueled detective’s first punch. Don’t start with some long-winded backstory about how your mom always told you stories growing up. No, no, no. Lead with the suspense, the stakes, the thing that makes your story sound like a bad day on steroids.

DO: “When Detective Molly Thorne finds her brother’s blood-stained knife at a crime scene, she’s got 48 hours to clear his name—or lose her badge.”
DON’T: “This is a story about redemption and self-discovery.”

Agents don’t want your protagonist to find their inner child; they want murder, they want scandal, they want tension so tight it could snap.


2. Get to the Point, No Dilly-Dallying

Ain’t nobody got time for a two-page life story. Think of your query like an elevator pitch, except you’re only going up two floors, not twelve. Agents get hundreds of these things—if you take them on a backroad tour of your plot, they’ll hit delete faster than you can say “whodunit.”

DO: Keep it under 400 words. Really. Describe the protagonist, the plot, and why it’s gonna be the next big thing.
DON’T: Give us the entire plot of the first five chapters. We don’t need every twist—just enough to make us need to read it.


3. Be Cool, But Not Too Cool

Look, it’s okay to be funny. It’s even okay to be a little edgy, especially if your book is funny and edgy. But don’t be that writer who’s just trying too hard. No one wants a query letter that reads like a string of memes.

DO: If you have a darkly funny mystery, let a little humor shine through: “It turns out the most dangerous place in the small town of Prairie Ridge isn’t the back alley—it’s the PTA meeting.”
DON’T: Write the entire query in all caps or slap an LOL in the middle.


4. Give ‘Em a Peek at Your Protagonist

Your main character is the one holding this thing together, so they’d better be memorable. Who are they? What drives them? If they’re a PI with no qualms about taking bribes, or a lawyer who works out of the back of a bar, say that. Agents want to root for a character just as much as they want to follow a plot.

DO: “Thelma Cray is a cynical, whiskey-loving coroner who’ll take any excuse to skip a department meeting—but when her best friend winds up on her own autopsy table, she’ll do anything to find the killer.”
DON’T: “Thelma is a complex character with many layers.”

We don’t need to know she’s a complicated lady. Show us how she’s complicated!


5. Show a Little Leg (a.k.a., The Stakes)

This is a mystery, right? What’s at stake here? A mystery without consequences is like a gun with no bullets—it might look cool, but it’s not gonna hit anything. Make sure the stakes are high and the tension’s enough to keep an agent at the edge of their seat.

DO: “If Jamie doesn’t find her daughter before the clock runs out, her ex-husband will win the custody battle—forever.”
DON’T: “Jamie is searching for her daughter. It’s very emotional.”

Emotional? I should hope so. But what does she stand to lose? The higher the stakes, the more an agent wants to see how it all shakes out.


6. Avoid the Query Clichés Like the Plague

If you’ve seen it in a hundred movie trailers, it’s probably a cliché. Think phrases like “life will never be the same” or “everything changes.” These don’t add suspense—they put agents right to sleep.

DO: Use your voice, not a bunch of generic tropes.
DON’T: Write anything that sounds like it came from the trailer for an 80s movie.


7. Comp it Right

Throwing in some comparables can help an agent figure out where your book fits in the market. But you’ve gotta be smart about it. Don’t call it the next Gone Girl unless it’s really got that psychological drama and twist. And don’t try to act like you’re the next Agatha Christie unless you’ve got an English manor and a dead butler somewhere in the story.

DO: “Fans of Sharp Objects and Big Little Lies will enjoy the suspenseful, small-town secrets of this mystery.”
DON’T: “This is like Sherlock Holmes meets Fifty Shades of Grey.

Save everyone the horror.


8. Keep the Bio Short, Unless You’re James Patterson

Agents don’t need your full resumé. If you’ve got some relevant experience, throw it in. If not, don’t panic—just keep it simple. A short line about why you wrote the book is fine.

DO: “I have a background in forensic science, which inspired this novel.”
DON’T: “I wrote my first poem at age 6, and my mom said I had a gift.”


9. Edit Like a Maniac

There’s nothing worse than a typo in a query letter. Agents are picky, and the second they see a typo, they’re out. Take an extra five minutes and check your work. Or better yet, have someone else read it for you—someone who’s not related to you.

DO: Spellcheck, re-read, and maybe even read it out loud.
DON’T: Send it the first time you write it and hope for the best. This isn’t a selfie—don’t go sending it out all unfiltered.


10. Leave ‘Em Wanting More

Your job isn’t to tell the whole story—it’s to get an agent interested in the whole story. Think of your query as a trailer. Give just enough to hook ‘em, and then close out with something that makes them want to read on.

DO: Close strong, maybe with a hint at a twist or an intriguing final line: “As Jill digs deeper, she starts to wonder if the killer she’s hunting might be her own son.”
DON’T: Include spoilers. If your mystery is ruined by a single spoiler in the query, you’ve already shot yourself in the foot.


Get in, hit ‘em hard, and get out. Agents have been around the block a few times; they know when a query is tight, clean, and professional—and when it’s a mess of tropes and typos. So bring your A-game, keep it short, and make them care. Write a query that slaps, and your novel might just get that green light you’ve been dreaming about.

 

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